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November 29 Got Awse? Smishy does!!smishy rocks my world! Shes so hot .. sometimes i take a frozen pack of like, peas or something past her and then they're cooked by the time i've passed her. Thats how hot she is. Seriously. I'm not exagerating. And not l like physically hot like a stove or something, I know i made it sound that way. But no, physically shes so hot she makes the thing from jeepers creepers look like .. nikki hilton or summen. I dunno.
Anyway. Moral of this story is. Richard wont stop biting my shoulder. And I rock. And your mum hates you, she told me so. But asked me not to tell you, but I'm crap at keeping secrets. November 26 and so then Dolly was all like "huh?"So last night at work, I found this ticket thingy. It was attached to some crates, and so with blatant disregard for authority (I'm so fucking punk rock) I took it, because it made me smile...and because I'm hard-x-kore. Its made even more funny because it would appear that MSN has deleted ("rejected", if you will) Dolly's space. Guess MSN didn't think she was that sexual after all.
Har Har.
Rejection: The story of Dolly's life. November 25 Why I am pro-choiceThis is a conversation I had this morning while I was meant to be studying for my exam this afternoon. In true Orgy style, his name is Chris Vanderryken, and his email is the_devils_child_12345@hotmail.com. He's the loser emo kid that threatened to stab me for "dissing his cuz", Josh.
Hilarious.
For those not on my msn list, "Individuality - All your friends are doing it, you can do it too!" is me, and "
Here is the entire, unedited conversation.
Individuality - All your friends are doing it, you can do it too! says: who is this Im In PaIn BuT ItS NoT LiKe YoU CaRe.... says: ur worst nitemare Individuality - All your friends are doing it, you can do it too! says: aaaaaaaahahahahahahahaha Individuality - All your friends are doing it, you can do it too! says: are you fuckin' serious? Im In PaIn BuT ItS NoT LiKe YoU CaRe.... says: nah Im In PaIn BuT ItS NoT LiKe YoU CaRe.... says:u suld no who i am u luv teasin mi kind Individuality - All your friends are doing it, you can do it too! says: I like teasing alot of people, but judging from your pathetic as fuck screen name, I'm guessing you're emo Im In PaIn BuT ItS NoT LiKe YoU CaRe.... says: yep Individuality - All your friends are doing it, you can do it too! says: So, got anything in particular you wanna say to me? Individuality - All your friends are doing it, you can do it too! says: 'cause now would be a good time Im In PaIn BuT ItS NoT LiKe YoU CaRe.... says: yea ur a dumb fukin cunt Individuality - All your friends are doing it, you can do it too! says: Yeah* you're* fucking* Im In PaIn BuT ItS NoT LiKe YoU CaRe.... says: i no wot i sed fuktard Individuality - All your friends are doing it, you can do it too! says: know* what* said* fuck-tard* Im In PaIn BuT ItS NoT LiKe YoU CaRe.... says: y da fuk do u keep doin dat Individuality - All your friends are doing it, you can do it too! says: You have terrible spelling and grammar, I'm trying to help you. Im In PaIn BuT ItS NoT LiKe YoU CaRe.... says: how i do it its quicker Individuality - All your friends are doing it, you can do it too! says: You used "mi" instead of "my" before. Individuality - All your friends are doing it, you can do it too! says: Same number of characters, the keys are separated by one key. Individuality - All your friends are doing it, you can do it too! says: I severely doubt that it would be quicker... Im In PaIn BuT ItS NoT LiKe YoU CaRe.... says: it is fuk hed Individuality - All your friends are doing it, you can do it too! says: Why are you in such a hurry? Im In PaIn BuT ItS NoT LiKe YoU CaRe.... says: coz i beta fings 2 do dun talk 2 an emo hatin fuktard Individuality - All your friends are doing it, you can do it too! says: Then why did you add me? Im In PaIn BuT ItS NoT LiKe YoU CaRe.... says: i dunno som1 told me 2 Individuality - All your friends are doing it, you can do it too! says: bullshit Im In PaIn BuT ItS NoT LiKe YoU CaRe.... says: day fukin did Individuality - All your friends are doing it, you can do it too! says: Josh and Kimmy don't hate me now that they know me Im In PaIn BuT ItS NoT LiKe YoU CaRe.... says: ok Individuality - All your friends are doing it, you can do it too! says: Who else would have told you? Im In PaIn BuT ItS NoT LiKe YoU CaRe.... says: som1 Individuality - All your friends are doing it, you can do it too! says: Fucking moron. Im In PaIn BuT ItS NoT LiKe YoU CaRe.... says: a lil birdy told me Individuality - All your friends are doing it, you can do it too! says: That is the lamest thing i've heard today. Individuality - All your friends are doing it, you can do it too! says: So anyway, you added me because someone told you to, and because you wanted to tell me that I'm a "dumb fukin cunt" Individuality - All your friends are doing it, you can do it too! says: Yet... you've got better things to do? Im In PaIn BuT ItS NoT LiKe YoU CaRe.... says: yep Individuality - All your friends are doing it, you can do it too! says: ...and so wish to shave miliseconds off the time you spend talking to me by typing with horrendous spelling and grammar? Im In PaIn BuT ItS NoT LiKe YoU CaRe.... says: fuk up Individuality - All your friends are doing it, you can do it too! says: or you'll do what? Individuality - All your friends are doing it, you can do it too! says: stab me? Im In PaIn BuT ItS NoT LiKe YoU CaRe.... says: hell yep Individuality - All your friends are doing it, you can do it too! says: oh... Individuality - All your friends are doing it, you can do it too! says: Well I guess I should be good then Individuality - All your friends are doing it, you can do it too! says: I sure learned my lesson Individuality - All your friends are doing it, you can do it too! says: By the way, in case you (courtesy of your obviously inferior intellect) didn't pick up on it, that was sarcasm. Im In PaIn BuT ItS NoT LiKe YoU CaRe.... says: i fukin new dat toss pot I almost forgot to write a secret message! I then got blocked. Is it obvious that I'm losing my inspiration for these messages? This moron is a prime example of why the legal abortion age should be raised to 17 years. Actually, make that 40 November 23 Here we are now, Segregate usOk, so most people that know me (or have eyes and can see the NIRVANA: BEST. BAND. EVER. thing in my list of favourite artists) know that I love Nirvana. They are freaking awesome. If you disagree, you are wrong.
What pisses me off though is that the large majority of people will recognise the awesomeness that is Nirvana, but then reveal that they have only heard one song, that song is ofcourse "Smells Like Teen Spirit". So you get all these yutzes who go around singing Nirvana's praise, saying they're the best band ever and whatnot, yet only know the one song, but because everyone seems to think they're awesome, they'll do what society does best by conforming and in doing so, claim to be Nirvana fans and part of the "alternative music scene". Asses.
The inherent irony here is that the one song that they know is about how stupid mindless conformity is.
"No way Richard!" I hear you cry, "Smells Like Teen Spirit is all about entertaining people and being a teenager!!!@#@!`~~one" To which, ofcourse, I would reply by saying, "Did you know that mixing Chlorine and Diesel and shaking it makes really pretty colours?" Note to the stupid: Chlorine and Diesel explode violently when mixed. Do not try at home. Remember: You are stupid.
I would then continue by pointing out relevant parts of the song, such as:
"Here we are now, entertain us"
People don't care about the message, they just want to be entertained, and they believe that that is the sole purpose of bands - to entertain and do nothing else. This was also what Kurt and his friends would say upon entering parties during high school.
"With the lights out, its less dangerous"
Aslong as no one sees the truth, theres nothing wrong with it, right guys? Right.
"I feel stupid and contagious" Smells Like Teen Spirit was written for the sole purpose of exposing Nirvana to a wider audience. They didn't like this, but at the end of the day, its what gets played on the radio, and they had to eat. Kurt himself said "I was trying to write the ultimate pop song. I was basically trying to rip off the Pixies."
This line represents how Kurt realises that making music just for money is stupid and defeats the purpose of art and expressing yourself. By saying he feels contagious shows how manipulative music can be. This song did, after all, make them famous.
"Our little group has always been
And always will until the end" This is to cater for their new audience of stupid teenagers (<16), many of whom have the "best friends for life!" attitude. They fail to realise that everything ends. "Until the end" means nothing, if i say "I'm going to wear this shirt until the end" i can take it off in 5 minutes, and as it has now ended, I still did what I said. By saying this, Kurt is implying that his new audience, though bigger, are morons, and will most likely not care about what songs actually mean (this was further expressed in the song "In Bloom").
"And I forget just why I taste Oh yeah, I guess it makes me smile" Like the majority of society, he is expressing how he doesn't know why he does things, he then says "I guess", implying that that is what society thinks it should do, and therefor how he thinks he should react. It is a similar line of thought which fuels my hatred of trends.
"I found it hard, it's hard to find Oh well, whatever, nevermind" Typical response when someone doesn't understand but doesn't want people to realise it. It also makes fun of the language people use, for example "whatever" implies that you will accept anything that comes, however saying it as part of that whole line implies exasperation and that you're only accepting the situation because you have to.
"A denial! Fact: Kathleen Hanna gave Cobain the idea for the title
A denial! when she spray painted "Kurt Smells Like Teen Spirit" A denial! on his bedroom wall after a night of drinking and vandalising around
A denial! Seattle. Kurt used to date Bikini Kill lead singer Tobi Vail, but she dumped
A denial! him. Vail wore "Teen Spirit" deodorant, and Hanna was implying that
A denial! Cobain reeked of Vail.Kurt thought she was saying he embodied
A denial! "Teen Spirit". He was pissed when he realiseda commercial product
A denial! was immortalised in one of his songs.
A denial!" ...This doesn't apply to you... right? November 21 And so then i was all like "no"So apparently some people (who would rather just bitch about me to Alicia rather than to me, you know who you are... I don't... Alicia refused to tell me...) think that I'm conceited and egotistical for the previous blog entry referring to my awesomeness.
And while i've been typing this, Adam has confirmed his lack of brain cells in claiming the same thing. What a pioneer.
The sad thing is that the people who think this have actually met me, and know what I'm like and so should see that me writing that is all in the name of comedy and that I'm not actually being serious (not to say that I'm not awesome, just...you know...). So anyway, you're all morons
 In other news, I got the new SYSTEM OF A DOWN album
HYPNOTIZE! today!How excited am/was I?
Pretty Freaking excited, thats how much.
Hypnotize rocks pretty damn hard.
"Hypnotize" (the track, not the album) is playing riiiiiiiiight now for those concerned.
Big thanks to Jessica (jemima) for lending me the $10 i needed to pay for it seeing as stupid work didn't pay me today... I had $4.72 in my account. I don't even remember spending any money. How fucking lame is that?
Pretty damn lame.
How awesome is Hypnotize?
Pretty insanely freaking awesome.
What? No And so then she was all like "yeah"...This morning, I realised something.
It was 6:00am, way to early for me to be awake
In all my time of being an emo-hating shit stirrer, and even times before that (that would be before the TREND occurred), I've been rampaging around insulting people on their own blogs and whatnot, but really, I have never been insulted in return. Its always just "fuk off man u lyk dunno sh!t emos rok" or something to that effect. So while people try to shut me down, they only end up countermanding what I have said rather than insult me.
This amuses the shit out of me
As such, there is only one logical explanation for this:
I'M FREAKING AWESOME AND Y'ALL KNOW IT! So if I'm the man then you're then man and... November 20 Lord Luck Combat!I have no freaking idea what that title is or means, i just clicked the cursor, and it it came up in the auto complete thing...weird...
Rapebo says: I can only come in babies!
Anyhow, some random who commented here had this thingy on her site, and i'm currently bored as all hell, so i'm gonna do it for you all to enjoy
For those unfamiliar with Rapebo, he is a hobo, created by Jhonen Vasquez, to rape things.
1. Choose a band and answer in only titles of their songs: Nine Inch Nails 2. Say Hello: Piggy 3. Are you male or female: Mr. Self Destruct 4. Describe yourself: Big man with a gun 5. How do some people feel about you: Throw this away 6. How do you feel about yourself: I do not want this 7. What is your nickname: Reptile 8. What is your favorite food/drink: A Violet Fluid 9. Describe where you want to be: A Warm Place 10. Describe how you live: Just like you imagined 11. Describe how you love: Love is not enough (alternatively: "Fist Fuck"... hehe, couldnt resist) 12. What would you ask for if you had just one wish: The hand that feeds 13. What is your current mood: Ripe (with decay) 14. Share a few words of wisdom: The way out is through 15. Now say goodbye: The day the world went away
and now because I'm EXTRA bored....
1. Choose a band and answer in only titles of their songs: NIRVANA 2. Say Hello: Turnaround 3. Are you male or female: Been a Son 4. Describe yourself: Negative Creep 5. How do some people feel about you: Something in the way 6. How do you feel about yourself: I Hate Myself And I Want To Die 7. What is your nickname: Anorexorcist 8. What is your favorite food/drink: Big Cheese and Mexican Seafood 9. Describe where you want to be: On a Plain 10. Describe how you live: Verse Chorus Verse (oooo, deep) 11. Describe how you love: Rape Me 12. What would you ask for if you had just one wish: a Heart Shaped Box 13. What is your current mood: Dumb 14. Share a few words of wisdom: They Hung Him On A Cross 15. Now say goodbye: Stay away RAPEBO IS COMING FOR YOU! (that means you Tris) November 16 Some of them want to be abused by youWell! It would appear that our good friend Kimmy the emo has disabled comments on her space, I guess that like most problems in her life, she just found us too much to handle.
Keep in mind however that there are still plenty more emos out there crying about their problems and playing the wrist fiddle to audiences of children.
this is the only secret message
This is bad.
Bad emos.
Keep up the good work team. November 15 What emos are REALLY thinkingBelow is a Typical Emo Thought Conversation (what goes on in emo's heads while they actually say other stuff).
goddamnit i hate emos
(for those who haven't been paying attention, Josh and Kimmy are 2 moronic kids following the emo trend)
they're so fucking lame
Here are their stupid thoughts:
Emo is just another stupid trend. Like yoyos.
Kimmy: "Look guys! fresh scars! Oh man I am so cool"
Actually i take that back, yoyos are cool.
Kimmy's Emo Friend 1: "wow Kimmy, you're so fucking emo, I wish we could be more like you"
Kimmy brags about being non conformist, she's so rad
Kimmy's Emo Friend 2: "C'mon guys! Lets go home and slash our own wrists up! That'll prove that we're hardcore like Kimmy!"
I'm goin for a secret message record here
Josh: "Even though I supposedly like you and think you're cool Kimmy, I'm going to endorse self mutilation, even though it has been proven to have negative effects in the long term, because I like to think it makes us cool, after all, you can't be Emo without scars! I'm such a good friend. Maybe when we become better friends, I can help you decide on a method of suicide, after all, what are friends for?"
Josh thinks he's cool coz he wears eyeliner like the crow and cant spell
Kimmy: "Oh man, I can't wait to grow up and have kids and raise them to be emo, that way they can hate the world and pretend to be depressed just to fit in, hell maybe they'll even cut themselves, only the best for my kids!....wait...."
Josh also cuts himself so he knows he's alive. Like him picking up the knife/whatever wasn't clue enough. Fucking moron.
But seriously, don't worry poor lil emo kids, we all know thats not what you really think, this is just my little spin on it....
we all know you could never structure a sentence that well...
Spot the secret messages! theres more than one! November 11 Worst. Day. Ever.My day sucked, now you all have to hear about it.
Here is a list of why it sucked:
So those are the 10 reasons why today sucked.
this is not a secret message This on the other hand, is. November 09 <Generic Title>Now I'm aware that many of my comments on both this space and others have been viewed as harsh, unfair, or just downright mean...
Mainly because you're all fucking morons...
Yup. November 08 The 2/5/7/10 Second RuleIm bored, and so rather than study for my looming exams (the obviously intelligent choice), I decided I'd write another blog for you to feast your eyes on....mmm....blog....
On Rove [Live!] tonight, Rove made a passing comment about the "7 Second Rule". For those not "in the know" this refers to the ammount of time a piece of food can remain on the floor while still remaining edible.
There are several things I don't quite understand about this. Once the food hits the floor, do the germs and filth slowly accumulate over time? Or do they wait until time has elapsed before swooping down upon the food, like a bird of prey?
What i found odd is that everyone seems to have different time periods, so while Rove obviously believes in 7 seconds, I've always known it as the "2 Second Rule" while other friends know it as the 5 or 10 second rule.
This is where the inherent problem lies.
We can't all be correct, as that just wouldn't make sense. For example, assume I'm correct (and lets face it, I usually am) and it is the 2 Second Rule that is most accurate, then after 2 seconds, the item of food in question will be crawling with filth and thus unfit for eating, making the 5, 7, and 10 second rules incorrect.
Now the mildly intelligent individual would say, "Hey Richard, wouldn't the rule just depend on what sort of floor the food is falling on?!?" And i would say, "No, apparently not, as I've found through much scientific research (with bunsen burners and test tubes and other crazy scientist tools) that people will stick to their particular rule religiously, which indicates that the particular terrain people are in has nothing to do with the alteration of rules."
Following said intelligent person's line of thought however, I believe that a variable set of rules should be put in place, i.e. dropping something on the floor in the toilets of McDonalds should have less time than dropping it on the floor of your bedroom, etc.
So here is a small list to get you by:
And now I can't be bothered adding a proper conclusion to this, as I said, its only procrastination material, so I don't really care.
And yes, I'm aware that it may not make any sense. I couldn't thing of anything funny to put in here November 06 Best entry EVERThis is my shoe:
 Lots of happy memories with this shoe.
I bought a new pair today.
Yup...
Jesus loves you Skyler!Ok children, for your viewing pleasure, I give you the cutest baby ever.
 Her name is Skyler, and she is my awesome niece. She's almost as awesome as I am. Feel free to worship her, as lets face it, she is superior to you in every way.
(I finally got the "pic in middle of blog thing" working, but for some reason can't delete the photo below this that you gotta click to view... I guess what I'm trying to say is that I hate you all.)
Subliminal Message: Hug an emo today November 04 Listen to your head noiseOk children, I'm always ranting about what I think, now its your turn. My ethics unit at uni has inspired me to ask you all about your position regarding the "War on Terror". Do you support it? If so, tell me why, if not, tell me why. I want good reasons, not "coz lyke Bush is a jerk lolzor".
Now entertain me Jester Monkeys. |
:'( Im in PaIn BuT ItS NoT LiKe YoU CaRe.... :'( |
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